It wasn't until I was talking to the Queen Bee a couple of weeks ago that I realized I had completely forgotten about National Novel Writing Month.
That's okay. I don't feel the lack of it. In fact, I don't feel much energy toward doing any writing other than what I write at work. And that's not saying much.
I never would have thought that fiction writing could just drop off the table like that and roll away to live with the dust bunnies and other forgotten dreams in some hidden corner.
And again, it's okay. I don't know what I have to say, anyway. Silk encourages to write about my life but to me, that's what I do here. And since I have all of 20 readers on a good day (which is fine by me), I don't think there's much of a market to hear what I've got to say about my life. Honestly, I've paid a lot and I mean a lot of money to tidy up my life, throw away the trash, and neatly package up what's left. As for all of the abuse and neglect I endured as a child, I'm well over that and have forgiven my mother and anyone else who might have had a hand in it. Why do I want to open those boxes when the dessicated memories are to me like tattered garments that shrivel away more with every passing year? I don't. I just want to leave them be and move on.
If I could remember the breakdown of 2009, I could write about that, but I decidedly don't want to. 2002 - 2011 were all very difficult years. I don't want to waste any more time looking at them. I know I went a little crazy then. Maybe even a lot crazy, but I'm still here and the craziness has much abated. As long as I keep up with my meds, the cray-cray stays away.
No, I don't have anything to write about and I'm just as happy that way. Go NaNoWriMo one last day. Tomorrow starts a new month.
3 comments:
My problem is that I recently decided I have to post something of significance. I dropped that last week and started posting about crap again. I like reading you write about anything. Plus I worry a little the cats are unwell.
I never understood the NaNo... thing anyway. If one has a desire to write, one writes. If not, one doesn't. NaNo sounds to me like it's for people who don't want to write all that much, but feel like they should.
Whatever you write, I enjoy reading your thoughts. You turn a fine phrase and I find I look forward to seeing what is happening in your world.
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