No NaNoWriMo

It wasn't until I was talking to the Queen Bee a couple of weeks ago that I realized I had completely forgotten about National Novel Writing Month.

That's okay. I don't feel the lack of it. In fact, I don't feel much energy toward doing any writing other than what I write at work. And that's not saying much.

I never would have thought that fiction writing could just drop off the table like that and roll away to live with the dust bunnies and other forgotten dreams in some hidden corner.

And again, it's okay. I don't know what I have to say, anyway. Silk encourages to write about my life but to me, that's what I do here. And since I have all of 20 readers on a good day (which is fine by me), I don't think there's much of a market to hear what I've got to say about my life. Honestly, I've paid a lot and I mean a lot of money to tidy up my life, throw away the trash, and neatly package up what's left. As for all of the abuse and neglect I endured as a child, I'm well over that and have forgiven my mother and anyone else who might have had a hand in it. Why do I want to open those boxes when the dessicated memories are to me like tattered garments that shrivel away more with every passing year? I don't. I just want to leave them be and move on.

If I could remember the breakdown of 2009, I could write about that, but I decidedly don't want to. 2002 - 2011 were all very difficult years. I don't want to waste any more time looking at them. I know I went a little crazy then. Maybe even a lot crazy, but I'm still here and the craziness has much abated. As long as I keep up with my meds, the cray-cray stays away.

No, I don't have anything to write about and I'm just as happy that way. Go NaNoWriMo one last day. Tomorrow starts a new month.

Time to Put on My NaNo Pants

I'm horribly behind on my NaNoWriMo word count. I think when last checked, it was just a tad under 5,000 words. Ruh-roh.

Well, the chick did what all the chicks in my novels do - run off to a ridiculously expensive hotel (a junior suite at the Hotel de Crillon is about $2,000 / night) and take a nice hot bath. So she did that and then I didn't quite know what she wanted to do, but as it turns out, all she needed was a good night's sleep. It's tiring to get threatened by a grubby little Frenchman. Especially if he is persistent and cruel.

I feel back on track tonight. I came home and changed directly into my NaNo pants. These are fake yoga pants (not one pose has been posed in them) and the top is a pajama top of lavender fleece with two grey kittens embroidered above the left breast.

My dinner was lychee juice and three bit-size Twix candies.

Sounds about right to me. On y va.

NaNo, NaNo

Well, I'm trying it again.

M will serve as my inspiration. From four months as a non-runner to finishing the Auckland Marathon in under five hours, she opened some eyes.

I started NaNoWriMo yesterday. I got in my daily quota.

You can find my work of literary art - or a little bit of it, anyway - here. Er, I'm not sure the link will work, but anyway....

If you don't like it, I'm sorry. I don't want to know.

However, if you know anyone who's a crisis negotiator or is from Texas, just holla.

What To Do, What To Do?

In about half an hour, I'm going to straighten myself up a bit - these early Sunday mornings do take a toll - and head out to a NaNoWriMo thing.

What? You've never heard of National Novel Writing Month (http://nanowrimo.org)? During the month of November, thousands of people around the world sit down and write a novel. It is only for the month of November. You can be the merest, curious amateur. All you have to do is to find a way to get words onto paper or pixels. If you want to know more, check out the link.

I've done this in 2004 and 2006. I totally freaked in 2006 when I entered an excerpt from a mystery novel that featured murder with a pair of scissors and found the excerpt illustrated with...a pair of scissors. Totally not my doing. And I thought - wait. People actually read this stuff?

In 2007, I was too busy with my new job. In 2008, I was too busy panicking about my job. This year, I've learned I can push panic aside for a few minutes at a time. I'm thinking about nano-ing again.

The only problem I have is deciding what to work on.

I have:

- A mystery set in Paris, having to do with races. This is the most fun and escapist and probably the most commercially viable. It will involve a lot of research, but the research could easily be fun. Includes spunky tall heroine, well-to-do Frenchman and his scrawny younger brother.

- Les memoirs. I know I've been setting down some incidents here. The other day, I made a list of incidents and observations. The thing about this one is that I could not do it at the breakneck speed NaNoWriMo needs. These bits have to come about thoughtfully.

- Then there's one I've scribbled a few pages on. A native Richmonder moves back after years in New York - and other than the setting, there is nothing autobiographical about it. It's a mystery, set in the Fan District and involves the theft of a painting to be shown in a gallery. No one quite understands why it was stolen. It wasn't that valuable but it's important enough to not shrug it off. I think my ambivalence on this one shows. I'm ambivalent because the heroine is not the kind favored in most fiction. She is older, tired, has recently suffered an illness that she may or may not recover from. I'm still working on her. The thing I should keep in mind is that I'm in love with her best friend since high school, Penny, who runs Cobblestone Alley Books, harkening back to my days at VCU when Back Alley Books still existed. I think there are too many blanks that require too much hard thinking to get a run at this one.

This should be a clue. When the sidekick is more interesting to you than the main character, it's time to switch main characters.

I've unofficially completed a NaNo book once. In 2004, I was writing a novel that I didn't complete by the Nov. 30 deadline. I went on to finish it anyway, and it was so horrible that I can't find it and I don't care that I can't find it.

I have so many little beginnings scattered around the house. In the file drawers. On my dead hard drive (sob), in the layers and layers of papers scattered on my desk. They tend to be about the same thing. Usually a mystery, sometimes light, mostly dark, all unfinished. I'm not so keen on writing romances, but I would someday like to try my hand again at serious fiction. And by that I mean the likes of Elizabeth Berg and Anne Tyler. I don't think I have the stamina for it right now.

So. The Frenchy thing, I think. Something light and interesting and fun, to distract me from the advent of The Long Dark, which starts exactly a week from now.

First of the month blah blah blah

NaNoWriMo

Yes, children, once again it's National Novel Writing Month. I'll participate, kinda, but I will make absolutely no attempt to hack out 55,000 words or whatever it is by the end of the month.

'Had she been beautiful' is moving along surprisingly well. The trip to the Hudson Valley gave me tons of detail and material to work with. And maybe I can somehow write off some of this on my taxes? But anyway, NaNoWriMo-ers, I'm with you.

I quit last year not long out of the gate because I had a truly creepy experience, which I'm sure was just mere coincidence. The book I was writing then (and still want to finish) involved murder with a pair of dressmaker's shears. When I posted to the NaNo site, the excerpt was put into their format and the title page had hearts - and two pairs of scissors.

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Why, It Must Be Mania!

I got paid yesterday and went a little off my nut. Here's what I bought, madcap girl that I am:

- A new pair of shoes from Land's End ($36.50)
- A pet fountain ($70). Yes, there's a reason for this. One of the cats is sick and needs to be coaxed to drink more water. The old fountain was leaking so badly, it was decommissioned.
- A ticket to the Bruce Hornsby/Ricky Skaggs concert next April ($60). I think of it as a form of life insurance.

What I want now, what I really, really want now, is a laptop. Yes, I love writing in longhand, but I never get around to transcribing it.

Note: Technical Support, please advise. Macs aren't even in the running, btw.

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No Halloween. Period.

I came home from work, closed the curtains and all the blinds and dared anyone to ring the doorbell. Actually, here all the little kids with the cute costumes have already been by, by the time I get home from work. All that come around by the time I get home are 14 year olds wearing a hoodie and carrying a pillowcase. To them I want to say, you are too old. And you aren't even making an effort. Go away.

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The Time of the Troubles

Well, here we are in holiday season again. Gah. For Thanksgiving, if the weather is good, I'm going to NYC. If the weather is bad, I'm staying home and making the Orphan's Thanksgiving for myself.

Christmas is more problematic. Since we all know I will not be visiting Emma again, possibly ever, and I have no money, I will not be leaving the Great Garden State for the holiday.

I have to start preparing myself for Christmas. I try to tell myself it's only one day. And it is. It's just a really hard day.