Phoebe - Worse this morning

I think Phoebe will be taking The Last Ride this morning.

She labors for every breath. She can't even meow at me. There is a tired look in her eyes.

I don't know what else I can do for her to keep her here with me.

I think to myself, maybe I should see how she is this evening.

And then I think, do I want to leave her here without me all day, struggling to draw in each breath?

I'm worried that I might be doing this for me - because it hurts me to see her struggle. Because I'm frustrated that I can't make her better.

My practical side knows that I can't miss a day from work, especially not today, which is full of Big Meetings.

Eight cats.

My God, I will miss her so very much, my sweet Phoebe.