Milk Bottle Options

Oh, man, this jealousy thing! Is it the return of spring and sunshine that brings out the normally contained evil jealous me?

It doesn't help that my commute now takes me past four of the most expensive private schools in the United States and one of the country's most expensive and prestigious universities. All the towns are quaint and ungodly expensive.

And then I go park in a lot with Mercedeses and Volvos and other expensive non-American cars.

When I go into work, I work on systems that handle stock options. I started seeing test data that was labeled: Projected Total and would see figures for half a mill and upward. Even $38K would elicit from me the response that it would solve a lot of problems for me.

I just kept winding myself up about it. And I realized I could not think about this as money. I thought, well, think of something you could have a lot of but would not necessarily want. I was being very unimaginative that day, because I couldn't think of anything I wouldn't want a lot of.

Then I came up with milk bottles. I don't know why exactly, but this works. Now when I see a figure on a report that reads something like $485,000, I think, wow. That's a lot of milk bottles. I'm glad I don't have to deal with them. Where would I put them all?

Silly milk bottles.